literature

AL14. Eng (2nd part)

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Alia... Is that my name? It doesn't seem to be so important. But hers is. Diane... And the kids, Elijah and Rob... My family. They were my family, the only one I ever had. Are they still? Where are they? I have to find them. They could be anywhere. I protected them; the cleaners couldn't have found them. I have to get out of here.
I walk fast. The scene doesn't change too much in the different places I've seen. What a slaughter... Why am I still alive? Maybe I fainted, and whatever it was, the one who did this thought I was dead. Right now I don't remember if I had any weapon close to me which I could have defended myself with. Although... where I woke there weren't any corpses... This is very strange.
I go ahead and I arrive at a place which looks like a warehouse. On the door there is a large letter A. Something compels me to go inside. In the walls things like drawers pile. The columns are ordered by letters, the rows by numbers. Instinctively I go close to one of them and I open it. Empty. There are only two wires, which look like plugs. What did I expect to find? When I close it I realize something. In the drawer is written L14. Area A, drawer L14... AL14... I look at my arm again. It's not written Alia... it's not my name... It's my code.

A figure stealthily departs the warehouse and goes through the installations, heading towards the exit. She doesn't know where the idea to do it comes from, thinking about it rationally, it's not the most convenient. But something moves her to do it. She stops in in front of a door. She shouldn't be there. But she is, and she hears.
-It must be a mistake in her system.
-I don't care why, she blurted out three of them. She even hid them from us. Do something. Now. Or you will end where they must be now.
-I'm going to fix it tomorrow, I promise, sir.
She doesn't need them to mention her to know they are talking about her. Silently, she runs to the exit.


No... this can't be true... I run, not caring about the sound of my arm. I know there was one here... I go inside somewhere which must have been a toilet before the destruction of this building. A small light blinks inside, but I don't need more. I see myself in the mirror. My long hair, black and matted, hides part of a face that looks like a human's. However, there are pieces where skin is left. My metallic skeleton is clearly visible in my chin, the upper left side of my lip and my right eyebrow. My jacket, torn, uncovers a metallic shoulder I haven't seen yet. It's not a prosthetic... That's why I didn't feel pain...

-You're cold.
-I'm not human, Diane, you know that already.
-Sometimes it's hard to remember...
-The safest thing for you is to not forget it.


Am I... a robot? Artificial intelligence, that's what I am. Now I remember... Artificial intelligence has always tried to recreate the human's way of thinking. The improvement... They thought they had imitated perfectly the performance of a real brain, and they modified all of us. And they did, or thought they did... But they didn't count on the feelings. To use as receivers for that improved new artificial brain, the systems in charge of killing wasn't their best idea. Although, if they cared so little about losing lives, being human, they didn't think we could care. Although it looks like.. I was the only one who cared... At least, when they discovered I did. I remember I escaped. I remember I heard that after it all area A's units were destroyed to prevent the same happening again.
Diane knew it... And she didn't mind... And.. and she loved me, nevertheless. Diane...where are you?

Two women. One of them works while the other lets her do it. The rusty scissors cut long black hair.
-I still don't know how it's possible for your hair to grow.
-I don't know, they never told me. They never told me anything.


I never knew anything. I never knew names, ages, circumstances... They found people who weren't important, and the cleaners took over them. They were many, too many. The fact that the rich people were so rich implied there were more poor people. It had been like that for centuries. I understand that before people fought for equality, for the rights that every human was supposed to have. Until new weapons were developed… Weapons that could kill an entire crowd in any area and no-one would ever know who did it. A trade that began in the shadows and later had everything under its control. It came at the point that nobody dared to complain. They were happy to serve the powerful ones, but there wasn't work enough for everyone. For those who couldn't find a way to earn money for living, the street was never an option, because we were there.
I don’t know anything about my manufacturing. I just know that I'm a robot with a human appearance so not to arouse suspicion amongst my victims. I have in-built weapons and an upgradeable and resettable brain. The ones who created me always trusted I would obey them because I don’t have a system that forces me to do anything I don't want to, like it would have been to kill Diane and her children. But I don't know why my hair or my nails grow, why there are living cells in my skin or why it appears I have veins and arteries under it. All wonders of the progress which weren't told, even to their children. Part mechanical, part biological. Because I'm alive. I can think and feel. Am I so different from humans?
Maybe Diane thought this. Maybe she realized, because of these little things, I was more than a computer with legs. Thanks to her I discovered that I could be something more than just a cleaner. That I could have a human life. That I wouldn't be a killing machine again. But then...

-Elijah, Elijah! Where are you?!
Two women run through the streets, one of them drags a kid. At first they try to not make any noise, but their despair had grown.
-Mom, I'm here!
They run to the boy. He's bruised, pale and his look shows terror. But he's alive. His mother hugs him strongly, crying, and the boy faints.
-Don't worry, Diane. He will get better.


Elijah disappeared. When I ran away with Diane, we were crossing the city for days, hiding ourselves during the nights whenever the cleaners attacked. I had to get rid of a pair of ex mates who managed to find us. We wanted to get far away from the city; I hoped to find an abandoned place, an ancient research factory or something similar where we could live. Nobody knows the exact location of these places, although I had investigated them previously. They wouldn’t find us there, those factories were isolated and the trackers' waves couldn't cross the walls ready for them. These places were used for research during the Second Cold War, this time between USA and East Asia. When the facilities improved and an apparent peace was declared, I don't exactly know which of these two reasons was more important, these factories were abandoned and new enterprises were built inside the important cities were built. The first of them, obviously, was in New York.
According to the data I had obtained, or stolen, depending on how you see it, there was one of these factories 10 kilometers away from the city. It would take time for us to arrive, but we would be safe there. Once we left New York, it would be relatively easy to remain unnoticed.
However, when we were almost at the edge of the big town, we were ambushed by a group of cleaners. In general we worked alone, but this times one of us was rogue. A cleaner who disposed of a pair of units who was against them. Miraculously, we escaped, but lost sight of Elijah in the process. We looked everywhere for him for hours. We arrived at point when we didn't care about our own safety. We would do whatever we could to find him.
And we did. He was badly injured, practically dead. In that moment we decided that the cleaners had left him, thinking he was a lifeless body to continue looking for us. In that moment I didn't think my mates were too effective for not relaizing his heart was still beating. I really was in a hurry to get out of the city, to arrive at the factory while safeguarding Diane and the children.
Since then, the journey was difficult. We couldn't lose any time, so I carried Elijah on my back and we ran from there. Behind me I heard Diane crying silently, fearing for the child's life. I felt the boy's breath getting weaker against my artificial neck, but I couldn't stop. At this rate, maybe Elijah wouldn't survive, but if we stopped to try and help him, maybe none of us would get out of the city. My logical mind refused to take the risk but my affection for the kid convinced me to move softly.
To be honest, I thought we wouldn't make it. The possibility was almost null, especially for Elijah. But... we made it. We arrived at the factory. There we healed the boy's wounds and he recuperated little by little. A small portion of nature had grown in the surroundings of the factory and inside of it. Wild and trying to take back what was its. We fed off the plants that took possession of the place, and I made a pit in the last floor of the subsoil. For any reason, the absence of an electric current didn't affect me and I could survive thanks to natural materials. We got ahead, we were safe.
But... then... what am I doing here now?
ATENCIÓN
Si eres hispano-parlante, aquí tienes la versión en castellano: lunnaris1995.deviantart.com/ar…

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Not too much to say, I hope you like it, comments and 
critiques are always welcome =D 

<- Part 1 lunnaris1995.deviantart.com/ar…

-> Part 3 lunnaris1995.deviantart.com/ar…


Thank you so much, :iconaasmith1294: for all your corrections and help! I don't know what could I do without you ^^


(This story belongs absolutely to me, and you're free to share the link of this page if you want someone more to read, but I would feel really bad if you try to copy it   :( Share, yes, but don't steal, please! ^^).
© 2015 - 2024 Lunnaris1995
Comments3
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AASMITH1294's avatar

…………How can I say anything after that shocking twist? Alia is a robot!?! The way you built up to it and now I realise it, the way you left hints to it in part one was terrific. Making Alia (I feel so much for her that I want to still call her that, like she’s human.) go through those stages of guilt, fear and compassion in part one truly made this twist breath-taking and my jaw just dropped! :D You really delivered such a powerful, enormous emotional punch there and this story becomes even more thought-provoking and emotionally resonant! :D

 

So sorry I took  while to comment, I have been busy this weekend and work is tough since I do weekend shifts. I really am lost for words because part two just shocked me and took my breath away. All the ways it makes the reader feel are hard to put in words but I’ll have a try :D

 

The way you continued with Alia’s search for answers combined with her memories and the uncertainty of Diane, Elijah and Rob really keeps the reader both tense and emotional, especially when you show how close she was to them and the wonderful way Diane looked beyond ‘what’ she was and saw Alia for ‘who’ she was. The way you have her say they were like family and how much she wanted to protect them despite being programmed to kill them in heart-warming but also emotional as well because we don’t know their fate yet. You’re keeping the reader captivated and are toying with them like an excellent writer should. I’m left both afraid, worried and anxious about what happened, all made possible by how you’ve written this.

 

I have to say I love the structure of the story and how it interplays between past and present at all the right moments! But that big moment when the twist was unveiled….. WHY!?! Poor Alia… To remember something like that?! You could just feel the panic and fear in her as well as the shock as she runs to the bathroom and sees her own face. How you describe it is beautifully done and captures exactly what Alia must be feeling and it connects the reader with her.

 

This story really is both presenting and approaching powerful themes and ideas, especially human elitism, human brutality and how we create new weapons, AI… and the most powerful one, can Alia be considered human? What makes you human?

 

To think how the rich seized the power and created something so human only to use it to kill others simply because they are unable to live really shows how cruel humanity can be and how they create ‘weapons’ to kill. It is all because the rich take so much and now control everything and you show this perfectly in the world you’ve created for these characters. The cleaners I said before were especially brutal and to know Alia was one of them, a robot, but then chose freely to help Diane and to then grow close to her… its all so powerful and emotional and you’ve done a wonderful job with it.

 

I really want to believe Alia is human and I do! She is Alia to me and how you’ve characterised her and shown her opposing her programming by doing what she can to protect them, even by thinking against her robotic logic and showing sympathy, is such a fantastic piece of writing and the story is unfolding so well.

 

Its such a thought provoking story and Alia really seems human to me and you as a reader really want her to be. She may be an AI but how she acts and how you write her just shows there’s more to being human. It actually really gets to you as a reader when you realise a robot showed more compassion and love than genuine humans who only want Diane and her children dead all because they are deemed weak by the rich.

 

A terrific part two and well worth the wait! Thank you so much for positing and translating it so quickly, that must have been so much work for you! But part two actually betters part one and I know this story is only going to get increasingly emotional, dark and shocking! After that twist I don’t know what to believe now…. You really have done such a terrific job and I’m loving this story and every character in it! The world, the story, the themes, the ideas and of course the characters are all excellent! :D

 

Amazing work Lunna and I really look forward to part 3! I really hope Diane, Elijah and Rob are safe and that we get answers to how Alia ended up so damaged as well as more answers to her origins, abilities and how this story will go on… The journey you put them through and how you describe her feelings of family for them and their love for her despite being a robot… its beautifully done and a wonderful story. :D

 

I hope my corrections helped with part one and you’ve had a great weekend that was a lot less busy than you’re week. Good luck in preparing for those English exams, I’m confident you’ll do well! :D

 

All the best Lunna! :hug: